By Amaya Gayle Gregory
Sedona (June 24, 2021) I’ve known for years that the answer to life was a full YES. I worked hard at finding that yes and often managed to say it and actually mean it even when the external elements cried out for a NO. Boy was I wrong. I didn’t understand it at all. There’s so much along the spiritual path that I interpreted through mind’s view and missed the meaning entirely.
There are several interpretations to the Give Life Your Yes teaching. One is actual factual at the level of mysterious mind-blowing, separate self dismantling truth — at the level of Consciousness Itself. From that understanding nothing ever happened, ever happens and there is nothing to say yes to, or anyone to say yes. This is the absolute freedom card of Life.
That understanding is real and true, but unless you have had your life shaken to its core, have seen the world and yourself crumble, it is unwise to parrot the words, and even less so to pull this card and blindly lower your head in supplication.
You can’t hurdle over life’s obstacles. They are here to catalyze growth and each glorious insight has its perfect moment to shine. Skip over one now and believing you’ve already got it, you’ll miss the full force its heart opening impact. Anything you know but haven’t deeply experienced isn’t known at all and prevents honest, deep knowing from blossoming.
Saying YES doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to accept the behavior of everyone in your life. That was a mistake I made … over and over again. It’s a common malady or at least that’s what I laughingly tell myself now. Common or not, it’s definitely a shoddy interpretation of what saying YES to life really means.
The more nuanced understanding is — yes, this is here. This is what is appearing in my world right now. You accept what is without trying to change it. Most want to skip over this step. It doesn’t feel very good. It meets the moment as it stands without judgement. Period. This yes is real. It doesn’t run. It doesn’t hide. It doesn’t even try to dress up what is. It takes whatever life is throwing at you head on, seeing it, sensing it, feeling it with nothing held back.
That is YES to life.
This YES isn’t a dead end. It doesn’t doom you to repeat the lesson over and over with no movement forward. This was a big one for me. Upon the spiritual path it is often hard to walk away from people who are abusive or narcissistic or clearly walking a different path. It feels like you are abandoning them. It feels like conditional love … and so you say Yes and walk straight into the brick wall at the dead end.
There is an important additional step to the nuanced understanding. I didn’t always know it existed. It’s easy to miss when you are focused on being unconditional, which by the way as long as you feel, sense or believe in your separateness, that zenith of love is impossible. Concentrate instead of being real. It never let’s you down.
The step: YES this is happening … now, what feels accurate? After checking your reactivity, your ego’s role in the story, you come from your heart and in love and do not continue down this path. It’s your YES to your life and is the loving thing to do for you and for the one who is unwilling to see the anger, the resistance, the need to control, and the judgment that is motivating their response. You step away in love — perhaps for an hour or two or perhaps more permanently. You do not have to stay to prove anything. You do not have to justify yourself. You are not failing anyone. Honoring your perfect, precious beautiful heart, honors all.
Give life your YES! Say it and stand right in the middle of your discomfort. Stay in it and listen for the next step. It’s often not what you expect. One step at a time. That’s all you can take anyway. Leave the next step and the one after that until it’s their moment to shine.